Pulp Fiction

Which wallet is yours?
You know, it's the one that says
"bad motherfucker".

Royally Lame

Prince Harry sent home
from Afghanistan because
war is dangerous.

Michael Jackson is broke

Up for auction soon,
Neverland Ranch! Complete with
elephant man bones!

Super Model Hospitalized

Naomi Campbell
in for "small cyst removal".
Wait! That is her brain!

Like a baby factory

Word on the street is
that Angelina Jolie
is pregnant again.

Academy Awards

And the winner is-
"No country for old men" by
Joel and Ethan Coen.

Go Lohan Go!

"I Know Who Killed Me"
won 8 Razzie awards and
set a new record!

Pop goes the pop star

Muy caliente!
J-lo and Marc Anthony-
They had twins today.

It's like a tiny U.N.

It is official.
Pax joined the Pitt/Jolie clan.
Lucky little brat.

KISS

Someone has leaked a
Gene Simmons sex tape.
The question is "Why?"

Lindsey Lohan Poses Topless

Lindsey has a nude
spread in New York Magazine.
About God damn time.

Bad Influence

Hannah Montana
is not wearing a seatbelt
in her new movie.

What is wrong with Paris Hilton.

I.M.D.B. says
The Hottie and the Nottie
worst movie ever.

We'll see how long this lasts.

Time Sizemore- out of jail!
Career advice for him. Stop
smoking crystal meth.

Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor not a holiday movie!

Star Trek has been pushed
back from December to May.
Live long and prosper.

Jane Fonda

She is seventy
years old, but you still can't say
"cunt" on Today Show.

Concerning the Island...

Writers went back to work.

I get five more episodes

of LOST. Me so happy. 

Piano Man Retires

Billy Joel will play

Shea Stadium final show.

The Mets still suck though.

Grammy's

Hey Herbie Hancock!
You did that one song- Rockit!
Here, have a Grammy!

He Was 75

Police chief from Jaws:

Roy Scheider died. "You're gonna

need a bigger boat".

WGA Strike Ends

Online movies are

worth one thousand two hundred

dollars. Strike is over.

Punch Line

I would pay to see
Carrot Top and Gallagher
battle to the death.

Actually, I'm shocked

Guess who's in rehab?
No more upside down kisses
for you Kirsten Dunst.

Insanity

Who is crazier?
Tom Cruise or Britney Spears? It's
really hard to tell.

Macho

I won ten bucks in
a game of bloody knuckles
with Morgan Freeman.

Light & Dark

Yin and Yang is like

Amy Winehouse and Miley

Cyrus. Seacrest out.

3 Weeks Until Oscars

If the producers 

write a contract, can writers

produce Oscar script?

Mz Spears

Hurry back Britney.

I miss writing about your

custody battle.

Super Bowl Sunday

Mark Wahlberg said that

the New England Patriots

would win. He was wrong.

So it begins

I just had dinner

at Sizzler with Joe Rogan

and Lindsey Lohan.